Thursday, April 13, 2006
Selfishness. It is an evil sounding word to many minds, yet it describes the core element of our human nature. Many of us realize it must be destroyed. The self must die. But when it comes down to practical application...death is just no fun. It's hard to give up all that good self service, especially when we start to see in exactly how many ways we cater to ourselves, even in our thoughts. We live in an age of self service.
I had a conversation with a friend recently who was lamenting the inescapability of selfishness. Afterall, it seems that everything we do has a motive to benefit self, or to obtain good things for ourselves. Can you honestly think of one thing that you do that does not bring you anything good in return? For example, I share my cookies with Johnny at lunch, not because I want Johnny to enjoy them instead of me, but because he's the coolest kid in class and if I can somehow become his friend, everyone else will like me too. Or how about a deeper example? I use my last 10 dollars to buy lunch for a beggar on the street. I have no expectations for returns. I do it because I know it was the right thing to do. But when I look deep inside, what really drove that decision? Why did I go hungry to feed someone else? Because it made me feel good! It made me feel like a good person. And then what about when I deny this whole world and follow Christ, have I finally rid myself of selfishness? Not if I did it in the hope of someday obtaining eternal life, according to our previous definition of selfishness. It seemed that no matter which example from my life that I thought of, I could not find one completely free of selfishness. This whole train of thought was pretty disturbing to me for awhile until I asked myself the question, "what's so wrong about wanting to obtain good for myself? What's wrong with wanting to benefit self?" The answer was clear. Nothing! The problem was with my definition of selfishness. Selfishness involves more than wanting good for myself. Afterall, if selfishness is desire to obtain the good for myself, I could never be a saint without wishing to go to hell! That's ridiculous! God has granted us an abundance of good things to enjoy. Does He expect us to always hand them off in an effort to avoid the plague of selfishness? I don't think so. There's nothing wrong with wanting that which is good. The trouble begins when we always demand to have it before the next guy, or instead of the next guy. Or keep them even when doing so is hurting the next guy. The Bible teaches to love your neighbor as yourself. It does not say love your neighbor after yourself. But neither does it say love your neighbor, not yourself. So perhaps my desire to keep good things for myself is not wrong so long as it does not exceed my sharing of those good things with others? I'm sure it's more complicated than that, but maybe it's a good start. ¶ 7:46 AM
I had a conversation with a friend recently who was lamenting the inescapability of selfishness. Afterall, it seems that everything we do has a motive to benefit self, or to obtain good things for ourselves. Can you honestly think of one thing that you do that does not bring you anything good in return? For example, I share my cookies with Johnny at lunch, not because I want Johnny to enjoy them instead of me, but because he's the coolest kid in class and if I can somehow become his friend, everyone else will like me too. Or how about a deeper example? I use my last 10 dollars to buy lunch for a beggar on the street. I have no expectations for returns. I do it because I know it was the right thing to do. But when I look deep inside, what really drove that decision? Why did I go hungry to feed someone else? Because it made me feel good! It made me feel like a good person. And then what about when I deny this whole world and follow Christ, have I finally rid myself of selfishness? Not if I did it in the hope of someday obtaining eternal life, according to our previous definition of selfishness. It seemed that no matter which example from my life that I thought of, I could not find one completely free of selfishness. This whole train of thought was pretty disturbing to me for awhile until I asked myself the question, "what's so wrong about wanting to obtain good for myself? What's wrong with wanting to benefit self?" The answer was clear. Nothing! The problem was with my definition of selfishness. Selfishness involves more than wanting good for myself. Afterall, if selfishness is desire to obtain the good for myself, I could never be a saint without wishing to go to hell! That's ridiculous! God has granted us an abundance of good things to enjoy. Does He expect us to always hand them off in an effort to avoid the plague of selfishness? I don't think so. There's nothing wrong with wanting that which is good. The trouble begins when we always demand to have it before the next guy, or instead of the next guy. Or keep them even when doing so is hurting the next guy. The Bible teaches to love your neighbor as yourself. It does not say love your neighbor after yourself. But neither does it say love your neighbor, not yourself. So perhaps my desire to keep good things for myself is not wrong so long as it does not exceed my sharing of those good things with others? I'm sure it's more complicated than that, but maybe it's a good start. ¶ 7:46 AM
